Hollywood's Porn Problem

Think of the last time you saw porn referenced in a Hollywood movie. What was the attitude towards it? Was it approached like it was kind of a joke?

I think it's safe to say we've seen a dramatic shift in attitudes towards pornography in recent decades. What was once considered sleazy, undignified and gross has in the age of the Internet become quite mainstream. Yet despite shifting attitudes and a greater tolerance for pornography, deep down many users know that it is not good or healthy.

But you wouldn't know it from the way it's chuckled at and shrugged off in the movies.

I believe Hollywood has a porn problem. The problem is treating porn like harmless fun, when in reality it is wreaking havoc on our society.

For this reason I was hugely excited when I heard that a mainstream movie was coming out which addressed porn as a cause for relationship strife. The movie I am talking about is Don John, directed by and staring Joseph Gordon-Levitt and co-staring Scarlett Johansson.

Off the bat I have to say that I am not recommending the movie. It is over laden with too many prolonged sex scenes, and spliced-in scenes from actual porn films. Really, if I knew it was going to be that graphic I would not have seen the film. Now I get that with an ugly subject like this, you have to show something of the ugly to be honest.. but this goes way overboard. This effect is over-the-top and, in the end, doesn't help communicate the message any more clearly. Save your time and avoid filling your head with these images.

Ok, basic plot summary. John is a young bartender from Jersey who loves working out, picking up girls, and watching porn and masturbating, sometimes more than 10 times a day. (Interestingly, John is Catholic who frequently-but-very-mechanically goes to Confession to relieve his guilt. However, the sacrament is portrayed quite cartoonishly; an arid transaction, with the priest rhyming off penances randomly without thought or concern for the person before him.)

One day John meets Barbara and falls for her, but there's trouble in paradise when she uncovers his habit. After John's denials fall flat, they break up. John opens up about this to an older women in his night school after she catches him watching porn on his cell phone. He reveals to her that he's been watching porn as long as he can remember, and can't recall the last day he didn't view it. He goes on to tell her that he prefers pornography and masturbation to actual sex with a woman.    

Gordon-Levitt chose some serious subject matter for his directorial debut, and it is encouraging to see someone in Hollywood with the courage to illustrate an all-too-common problem that is on the rise in our culture. 

Sadly though, he does not propose a real answer to the problem. His character shows some signs of maturation in finding the ability to not see women as solely a means to his sexual gratification. But it comes through an ongoing but uncommitted sexual relationship with his older classmate, which really begins with them using each other for sexual gratification.

Really? Is this the best moral awakening we can hope for?

Perhaps it is the best Hollywood can do, but the real answer is found in Catholic sexual teaching, which states that it is never acceptable to use another person as a means to an end. Whether you are lusting after someone on your screen, or utilizing someone for your sexual gratification in an uncommitted relationship (something Karol Wojtyla called "mutual masturbation"), you are still falling well short of what is owed them.

Which is love.

To show reverence for someone, to acknowledge their value and dignity means to offer yourself unreservedly to them, not in part. It means a self-gift that is free, total, faithful and fruitful. That means for them and no one else. No holding back. For life. 

I repeat that I do not recommend this movie because of its morally offensive sex scenes. But is laudable that someone in Hollywood is acknowledging the elephant in the room. Pornography is awful and destructive of relationships on so many levels. But we need to propose a real alternative to what porn offers, not just trade one sin for another. 

Further reading: The Weight of Smut, by Mary Eberstadt; Some eye-opening articles by Marcel LeJeune.